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    Jokes

    family

March 9, 2018

I wonder where my brother is, his lunch is getting all cold … … … and eaten..

I wonder where my brother is, his lunch is getting all cold … … … and eaten..

March 9, 2018

Sometimes I think I am a bad mother because I don’t like wine.

Sometimes I think I am a bad mother because I don’t like wine.

March 9, 2018

Me: I don’t scare easily. Pregnant wife: All four of our daughters will be teenagers at the same time. Me: *never stops screaming*

Me: I don’t scare easily. Pregnant wife: All four of our daughters will be teenagers at the same time. Me: *never stops screaming*

March 9, 2018

Whats does giving your sister head and light beer have in common? Even though it tastes the same, you still know something is very wrong.

Whats does giving your sister head and light beer have in common? Even though it tastes the same, you still know something is very wrong.

March 9, 2018

Parenting is filled with wonder. Like wondering why your 4 years old raced into the kitchen and quietly grabbed a handful of napkins.

Parenting is filled with wonder. Like wondering why your 4 years old raced into the kitchen and quietly grabbed a handful of napkins.

March 9, 2018

Our family motto is “Who took my phone charger?”

Our family motto is “Who took my phone charger?”

March 9, 2018

Your family tree must be a cactus because everybody on it is a prick.

Your family tree must be a cactus because everybody on it is a prick.

March 9, 2018

What did the giraffe say to the zebra when his mom called him home? Zebra later!

What did the giraffe say to the zebra when his mom called him home? Zebra later!

March 9, 2018

*wife walks in to see the boys have built a chair fort* Wife: PUT THOSE CHAIRS BACK! Me *climbing out of fort* YOU HEARD YOUR MOTHER!

*wife walks in to see the boys have built a chair fort* Wife: PUT THOSE CHAIRS BACK! Me *climbing out of fort* YOU HEARD YOUR MOTHER!

March 9, 2018

Last Father’s Day my son gave me something I always wanted: the keys to my car.

Last Father’s Day my son gave me something I always wanted: the keys to my car.